Category: Classic Stories
Working The Rail – My Life As A Male Stripper
This is a tale of sweaty man-gyrations, red-tassled g-strings and hot leather boots. Of cash, ass, sports cars and luxury villas. It’s a journey of epic proportions involving world travels, women and untold stories of debauchery resulting in vast riches. In 1993 (yes, I’m old motherfuckers), I was a rising star in the world of [...]
Losing My Virginity
My friend Chris got himself an apartment in Georgetown (downtown D.C.) just after high school. It was a pimpin little studio right near all the cool G-town bars. Every Friday night I’d head down and spend the weekend getting hammered and trying to pick up girls. The key word being “trying”. Actually, the key word [...]
The World Famous BK Blaster
This story is not for the faint of heart (or stomach) so be forewarned. It’s gonna get uglier than Rumsfeld and Bin Laden having gay sex in a vat of mayo. I take you back to 1989 when yes, I was a wee lad of 19. (I’m old motherfuckers, I know that. No need to [...]
The Bodybuilding Days Part 3 – The Pictures
If you read the two previous entries in this series, The Bodybuilding Days Part 1 – The Quest For Huge and The Bodybuilding Days Part 2 – Big Legs, you know I started my bodybuilding career by winning the Teenage Mr. Maryland. Understand, however, that I didn’t just wake up one day with huge legs, massive [...]
The Bodybuilding Days Part 2 – Big Legs
Continued from a previous blog. If you haven’t read it, do. It’s the beginning of this story: The Bodybuilding Days Part 1- The Quest for Huge So I work out for a few weeks at the YMCA. I do not, as I’d hoped, get massively huge. I spend much of my time there fearing Sloth and [...]
The Bodybuilding Days Part 1 – The Quest For Huge
I graduated high school weighing about 115 pounds. All of it was muscle, mind you, but I was still a skinny kid. Being skinny sucks. Especially if you’re short. And I’m short. Not freakishly, midget-ish short, but not tall. No one would ever mistake me for tall. I’m average height in a well-heeled pair of [...]
Bad Shrimp, Blind Date
Or should it be blind shrimp and bad date. Seriously, the shrimps little heads were cut off so technically they’re blind, right? And I wanted to cut my fucking head off during the date. Either way, both sucked ass. Speaking of ass, the next paragraph is going to mention shitting more than once. If that bothers you [...]
